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gary pinkel dui

Gary Pinkel Spends $306,538 on a Ride Home

A guy a know spent $306,538 on a ride home from dinner with friends on Wednesday night because he made an idiotic decision.

Okay, so I don’t actually know the guy. I’m talking about Gary Pinkel, head coach of the Missouri Tigers. Yes, the same Tigers who happen to be my favorite football team. This is a very sad day for me.

Gary Pinkel isn’t hurting for cash. He makes about $2.7 million a year to coach the Mizzou football team. Let’s just say he’s not poor.

But after going out to dinner with friends and having a few too many drinks, he decided a $50 cab fare would be too expensive for his budget. He tried to drive home drunk, got arrested, and now he’s suspended from his job for a week.

Not only is he suspended, but he’s taking a serious financial hit. $306,538 to be exact.

That’s right; Gary Pinkel put over $300k on the line (as well his own life and the lives of everyone else on the road in Columbia, MO) to try to drive home drunk instead of just calling a cab.

gary pinkel dui

I don’t necessarily think Pinkel is an idiot, but this has to be one of the most idiotic decisions I’ve ever seen anyone make.

As punishment for his actions, the school is withholding two weeks’ salary ($13,462) and incentives ($68,076), a bonus he would have been paid for making a bowl ($75,000) and his salary increase for next year ($50,000). And, he’s donating $40,769 to the school’s Wellness Resource Center, which is responsible for educating students about the dangers of drinking and driving.

I know what you’re saying: but that’s only $206,538! Where’s the other $100k? Well this is where it gets really embarrassing.

Gary Pinkel’s contract has a clause that pays him $100,000 in what is called a “social responsibility bonus”. That’s right folks, the man was literally getting paid $100,000 a year to just be a good citizen and not get behind the wheel drunk or break any other laws. And yet, knowing the dangers of driving drunk and how much money was on the line, he still did it.

Stupid stupid stupid.

Question of the Day

So here’s my question to you. How much money would someone have to pay you (annual salary) to GUARANTEE you’d never get behind the wheel after drinking.

And I’m not talking about driving if you’ve had 3 or 4… or maybe 5 (who’s counting anyway) and think you would blow a 0.07. If you’ve had more than one drink for every two hours you are out, you’re taking a cab just to be absolutely sure you don’t end up on the frontpage of ESPN.com, or worse, in the obituaries. I don’t care how your body reacts to alcohol; these are the terms you must abide by to receive the money. Two drinks at dinner and you can’t drive yourself home.

It’s not that you can’t drink; you just have to take a cab if you’ve been drinking.

For me personally, I hate the taste of alcohol and don’t drink the stuff, so I’d probably set my limit at $250. On the off chance I’m out somewhere and I do have a few drinks, I’d want enough money for a cab. DFW is a big place, so I could easily see the cab costing over $100. So let’s call it $250 a year and I can guarantee a 0% chance of me driving with even a small, legal amount of alcohol in me.

What’s your number?

27 thoughts on “Gary Pinkel Spends $306,538 on a Ride Home”

  1. You would not have to pay me anything at all. I don’t drink, with a once-a-year consumption of abut 1 oz of champagne. At home.

    You see, I carry a gun. (I’m a CHL and NRA instructor) Carrying a gun while intoxicated is a FELONY, and would cost me a lot more than $300K.

  2. You didn’t mention any financial repercussions (fines, defense attorney, etc.) that this guy will suffer as a result of his stupidity. So maybe it wouldn’t be too expensive for him, but for real people, legal fees, penalties, and defense attorneys can get real expensive, real fast.

    I personally don’t drink often, but ONE drink, even if very small, keeps me away from the driver’s seat. And the financial punishment (not to mention the shame) of getting caught driving under the influence….that’s plenty for me!

  3. My amount would probably be like $500 (would cover my cab fare for a year by far). I’m not a heavy drinker, but I know my limit and there are times I will not drink at all if I know I have to drive (like when I am out on my motorcycle).

    Lots of times I just meet at my friend’s house catch a cab with him to and from the bars since his company covers all his cab fare (he is the regional Skyy Vodka manager and they really don’t want him to get a DUI). So that works out really well for me.

  4. Kevin –

    Having a friend who had gotten a DUI a few years back I can honestly say that this is a good cost benefit analysis of why you shouldn’t drink and drive – other than the fact that it’s just f-ing stupid.

    I live in Austin and thus, drink quite often, but however much the cab costs will be WAY less than all the headache and expenses that pop up from drinking and driving.

    Word.

  5. Seems to me that making idiotic decisions and idiot seem to go together. Especially in light of all the college football press recently, the decision to not pay $50 for a cab is even more idiotic.

  6. I drink regularly, but I live in the hub of down town and I ride a bicycle (or split a cab with friends if we are going farther). I think that if I did drive a car, it would just feel luxurious to have the cab paid for, like Brian’s friend has arranged, in the second reader comment. Especially with a service like we have here in California, where two drivers will come get you in a cab and one will drive your car home for you. If I had that kind of access, I would go out more!

    Assuming that I would go out more, I think that it would cost me about $80/month in cab fees (I always tip my cabbie well– he might’ve saved my life and others’!), so that ends up as just under $1000/year.

    That may seem high, but I’m designing a fantasy here…

  7. It wouldn’t take much for me to guarantee it, I’ve never done it before and I don’t plan on it. That’s why you always need a designated driver. $250 would more than cover inconvenience costs and cab costs should I need to get a cab one night, but while we’re negotiating, I’d try and jack it up to the $100,000 the coach got. I would somehow find a way home every night. I’d also accept $100,000 not to drink alcohol for a year, but hey, that’s just me.

  8. I’m cheap, I’d do it for a hundred bucks. I drink about once a week, but I wouldn’t drive after drinking anyway, so it wouldn’t take much.

  9. You wouldn’t have to pay me anything in order to do what is right. The potential negative consequences are too great to drive drunk. However, if my employer offered me a bonus to behave of course i would take it.

  10. I used to walk home from the bar, just to be safe. Then I found out that driving home drunk is eight times safer than walking home drunk. In addition, since there is only 1 DUI arrest for every 27,000 miles of drunk driving, I have another good 270 years before I get my DUI.

    Bartender….ONE FOR THE ROAD PLEASE!

  11. Well if they are willing to do that then they are probably a sucker. Id start high and let them work me down. $10,000. I rarely drink, and never drive after I have, so its not like I’d be doing anything different anyway.

    Here’s is my question to you

    Pinkel’s Salary: $2.7M
    What he does for you: Nothing, mabey brings a little intertainment into your life.

    Bank of America CEO Brain Moynihan’s salary (2010): $1.94M
    Whe he does for you: At least tries to make shareholders happy.

    A. Rod’s salary $34M
    What he does for you: about as much as Pinkel

    Average fortune 500 CEO salary: $11.4M
    What they do for you: Make you money, stockholders!

    Tiger Woods, Michael Vick, OJ, LiLo, Paris – need I say more.

    Talk about a group of nearly useless, over paid people. Yeah, sure, sometimes a stock goes down or a bank wont make you a loan, but It seems to me that the Occupy folks are angry at the wrong crowd; am I wrong?

    1. @Waterbuffalo…have you been sleep during the last few corporate malfeasance events? Is your understanding of world wide financial crisis situations limited to crayon books? Almost every major world financial crisis in modern history was the result of deliberate actions taken by a relatively small group of powerful wealthy individuals, and NOT due to acts of God or Nature. They end up weakening the countries financial stability, costing Americans their jobs, and forcing taxpayers to bail industries whom have become psuedo-monopolies that were so tightly integrated within our financial structure that their collapse would cause even further pain. The Great Depression WAS NOT an accident….and neither was the recent Great Recession. So tell me please…what do athletes, musicians, and celebrities have to do with that?

      “Yeah,sure, sometimes a stock goes down”

      No big deal huh? I guess all those folks they held Enron’s $60 BILLION + in stock looked at it the same way. Did you realize that pension funds across America were impacted from coast-to-coast…losing hundreds of millions of dollars?

      Do yourself a favor …and actually read some history books when you get a chance…for history DOES repeat itself

  12. I drink very rarely. No reason behind it except I do not like the feeling. If I did, I would have a ride home. My kids do drink and they have designated drivers or take cabs. Frankly, I do not understand drinking and driving.

  13. It’s all about Self Discipline and Responsibility. It’s not the alcohol per se. It’s the person’s choice to be influenced and be drowned with alcohol. There are always limitations and he has forgotten it.

    1. It’s not the alcohol?

      Of course it’s the alcohol! Even one drink can impair someone. Why drink alcohol at all? Is there a real benefit?

  14. Since I don’t drink, I guess the better question for me would be, how much would you have to pay be to drink.

    1. I am quite surprised that he did not get fired. When you have a job that gets you tons of public attention, you can’t make these kinds of stupid mistakes. Enjoy your mistake.

  15. I very rarely drink, and I’m a nervous driver at best. So, pretty low. $100? There are a couple of times that I have been out and had one drink – I start feeling it usually half a glass in – but stayed out long enough for the effect to wear off and driven safely home.

  16. I’d be cheap because we always plan the rides before we go out – why risk leaving a car somewhere overnight? Having a DD is easy enough.

    This whole thing reminds me of Scandinavian traffic tickets.

  17. should’ve hired a chauffeur service to take him home, it would’ve been cheaper than a taxi plus some of them will drive you home in your own car.

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