• For a downloadable MP3, go to the “Downloads” page.

Haven’t Made A Budget

I’m not surprised, my money goes fast
I’ve broken my bank so many times, I stopped keeping track
Tried to show off with a brand new TV
But we can’t even watch it without electricity

I tried so very hard to impress her
Because I wanted so badly to undress her
Just had to make her fall in love with me

All I have to do is make her think that I’m rich
And next thing I know I’ll get a date with that chick
I just need a car, I think I’ll go buy a Corvette
I just haven’t made a budget

I won’t have to wait, this much I know
Cause the interest is high but the payments are low
Add insurance and gas and it costs half what I make
But I’ll have it paid off in 2028

And I thought the car would be so amazing
But I realize this girl is gonna change me
Now I know how to make her fall in love with me

She wants a guy with a 401k
Diversified stocks in a Roth IRA
A good credit score, and zero credit card debt
She wants a guy with a budget

There goes my ‘Vette
I’ll buy a used Buick
And with the money I save
I’ll invest like the kids from etrade

And I know that we can be so incredible
When I have an impressive portfolio
With index funds, ETFs, small caps and REITs

And by the day that I turn 54
I’ll have $10 million or more
We’ll travel the world in my own private jet
Private jet, private jet, private jet

Oh, you know it’ll all be great
Even a Cosmo bachelor won’t get her on a date
‘Cause my 529 has college money for our kids
Yeah, I finally made a budget

Yeah, I finally made a budget
Yeah, I finally made a budget?

  • For a downloadable MP3, go to the “Downloads” page.